I found out in recent years my DNA is Swedish and Danish, and a small percentage German, even though both of my parents came emigrated from there. We visited Finland, Sweden, Norway, and Denmark last month. I was very intrigued to learn more about the Vikings, especially about the role of women, that we often don't hear about. They were held in high regard as householders and seers, and held the keys to their homes. It shifted something in how I view myself knowing that I came from Vikings. I enjoyed reading your tattoo stories since you come from the same stock. I love that you and your daughter have the same tattoo-very cool!
I’ve been to those countries as well. Simply amazing. Hope to go back with my daughter someday. Yes, Viking culture is very different in its treatment of women. They were highly regarded, and to this day they are treated with respect. Yes, the tattoo is a symbol of a very special bond. I hope to learn more about my ancestry. Lots of Finnish, not surprisingly, because my dad’s family came from up near the polar circle. Thank you for your generous comments.
I too have Swedish /Danish Viking heritage! When I went to Iceland 2 years ago, I was drawn in and mesmerized by the mythology and felt so much kinship with the culture and history. Your Helm of Awe is a powerful symbol.
Karen, it really is. I’m so glad my daughter chose it. And though I’ve been to the other Scandinavian countries, I haven’t been to Iceland. Would love to go someday.
What a beautiful essay about your ink. From the land of lefse, I could relate to the challenges: your daughter's purple hair at the funeral was a nice touch. "We're not snowflakes, Mom!" I'd never heard of the Helm of Awe. This is the second mother-daughter tat story as I recently read Deb Sinness' story of their shared daisy tat. You are the first person to describe the pain experience in a way that makes me entertain the possibility. Maybe a temporary tat first, though. Needles. Yikes. Love your writing.
Jill... I just want to mention that both my tattoo experiences were truly painful... but so worth it! If you're interested in finding out more, read my essay "Aloneness and Bird Wisdom" 🐦⬛
I love this symbol for you and your daughter, Mary. I see 'helm' as a perfect Tattoo for you both. 'Leader, guide and legacy of words passed from mother to daughter.' There's something magical in the symbol, and I felt a tingle-thrill as I read your article. Some things fit perfectly. Shield and sword arms ready. In your case, 'the pen is mightier than the sword!' ;-) A beautiful essay, as always!
Thank you, Victoria! I do feel a special connection with my daughter, and I wanted to show that. I love her so deeply. It moves me profoundly that she wanted to do this with me.❤️
Oh, my dear. You are the most exquisite writer. I'm so happy you did this. Shared the story AND got the tattoo. I love sharing the "badass" designation with you! xoxo
Nan, isn't it great? Thank you for lighting a fire under me. Wish I'd gotten it done earlier, But it would have been a completely different essay. xoxo
I love that you were the one who suggested getting tattoos with your daughter. What a special relationship you have with her. Growing up I was very close with my mother, the original badass, but when she wasn't supportive of my marriage, a chasm opened between us. I wish she could have been less badass and more vulnerable about her fear of being replaced as my best friend. It turns out the real flex is honesty rather than bravado. I'm drawn to you and your writing Mary because you don't shy away from the hard feelings. I've learned that real strength is revealing our perceived weaknesses and deepening our relationships with those we love the most. XO 🥰❤️
Amy, so true. Relationships are complicated. It isn't our job to fix them, but to change and grow within them. Love this comment! You are so special to me. I haven't revealed my top reads for the summer, but you may be on that list. 🤗🥰💕
Thank you for this beautiful post! I’m 55 and wanted a tattoo when I was in my 20s, but it was illegal in Massachusetts at the time. As a grad student I lacked both the time and money to go travel to get it done. I’ve had the urge on and off since then but couldn’t decide what to get. Now, at 55 I am strongly considering it again.
I thought about it for a very long time. Years. But the time was never right. And then it hit me: why not get matching tattoos with my daughter? She came up with the design. It was meaningful on so many levels, and why not. So glad I did.
I love your way with words. This one made me smile all the way through, with familiarity. My now 22-year old daughter has over the years had me accompany her to purchase Docs, has had hair dyed purple, green, and burgundy, and has recently been gently inquiring if I would EVER consider getting a tattoo with her. She has two. I love the meaning of the one you and yours chose. Thanks for this.
Wendy! The hair. How many colors are there in the rainbow? I remember bringing her to expensive salons when she wanted it bleached, and of course it turned some crazy shade of orange and fell out. I don’t remember how many pairs of Docs she had. But when she graduated from high school, her hair was long, blond and beautiful and she looked like a model. The things they put us through. This tattoo, though, is so meaningful. It makes it worth every single we went through.🫶
Mary, I loved reading your story and especially about your Viking roots. I think it's great that you have your tattoo. I'm Jewish, and we're not supposed to have tattoos, which is fine, since I'm also a chicken. However, I'm not afraid to admit that despite being a proud Jew, I happen to love, and have since childhood, the stories of Norse legends. Even though Wagner was an active and verbal anti-semite, I can't help loving the music he wrote for the Ring cycle. My wife and I just finished watching Das Rhinegold and we'll soon watch Siegfried. At the moment, we're watching "Love for Three Oranges."
If I had a tattoo, I think it would be a Moomin. I love the books by Tove Jansson and read them to my sons when they were growingup.
Thank you, Sandy! Fortunately, the Helm of Awe has been mostly left alone by the hate groups, because the meaning isn’t in your face like some of the others (many contain runes and are much more identifiably Nordic). I do have to set aside the appropriation of these great works by evil minds in order to appreciate the beauty. I haven’t listened to the complete Ring, but I want to get back to it. For me, it’s hard to give up the canceled authors.
A Moomin would make a delightful I I’m mom tattoo. I love those books and pictures.
GREAT ink story! My body's introduction to ink was 3.5 years ago, after Mark died. A line drawing of a couple kissing. Simple. Almost abstract. Since then, added another, an unalome, which my daughter had done at the same time, but with subtle variations. I love tattoos because they're often a memento, and an invitation to share our all-too- human stories.
I’ve thought about adding another one. But I’m moving cautiously. Love owls, as he did. I have them all over the house. I’m so happy to have sent this post out. Wonderful to hear from you.
It’s so interesting how a shared symbol can bring two people together. Or art, as in the case of my own mother! I can think of so many ways this would have horrified her. Such a joy. I’m so glad things are different with my own daughter.
I can see you acquiring one, maybe connected to your travels or teaching. My husband did take a nice picture, didn’t he? He has a few more on his phone, which I still have access to. (That’s a story I’m working on.) But this one is the best. Thanks, Jenna, for stopping by.
To say I relate is an understatement. But briefly-- I got my first tattoo (hummingbird on a morning-glory vine, right shoulder blade) when I turned fifty, because my daughter was turning 18 and declared she was getting one. So I said- ok, we'll get tattooed together. And we did. The, when I turned 65 (after going through much personal trauma) I got an owl on my left forearm. My recent post "Finding Feathers" speaks to this... https://kanderson.substack.com/p/finding-feathers Thanks for your wonderful and inspiring writing, Mary! p.s. Both my daughters (late 30's) have multiple tattoos. I may just get another one before my days run out...
Karen, I’m so glad this spoke to you. I’m thinking about getting another one myself. After all, I have plenty of space! And moments to hold in my memory. I will definitely check out your post. Thank you for sharing it.🙏
I so enjoy your writing! And from what I can tell, your daughter is one lucky woman to have a badass mother like you! :) I am serious.
Thank you, Manuela! You are so kind. You just made my day.😊
Mary, another wonderful essay. "At this point he can't say no." LOL Thank you for the mention.
I found out in recent years my DNA is Swedish and Danish, and a small percentage German, even though both of my parents came emigrated from there. We visited Finland, Sweden, Norway, and Denmark last month. I was very intrigued to learn more about the Vikings, especially about the role of women, that we often don't hear about. They were held in high regard as householders and seers, and held the keys to their homes. It shifted something in how I view myself knowing that I came from Vikings. I enjoyed reading your tattoo stories since you come from the same stock. I love that you and your daughter have the same tattoo-very cool!
I’ve been to those countries as well. Simply amazing. Hope to go back with my daughter someday. Yes, Viking culture is very different in its treatment of women. They were highly regarded, and to this day they are treated with respect. Yes, the tattoo is a symbol of a very special bond. I hope to learn more about my ancestry. Lots of Finnish, not surprisingly, because my dad’s family came from up near the polar circle. Thank you for your generous comments.
I too have Swedish /Danish Viking heritage! When I went to Iceland 2 years ago, I was drawn in and mesmerized by the mythology and felt so much kinship with the culture and history. Your Helm of Awe is a powerful symbol.
Karen, it really is. I’m so glad my daughter chose it. And though I’ve been to the other Scandinavian countries, I haven’t been to Iceland. Would love to go someday.
What a beautiful essay about your ink. From the land of lefse, I could relate to the challenges: your daughter's purple hair at the funeral was a nice touch. "We're not snowflakes, Mom!" I'd never heard of the Helm of Awe. This is the second mother-daughter tat story as I recently read Deb Sinness' story of their shared daisy tat. You are the first person to describe the pain experience in a way that makes me entertain the possibility. Maybe a temporary tat first, though. Needles. Yikes. Love your writing.
Jill... I just want to mention that both my tattoo experiences were truly painful... but so worth it! If you're interested in finding out more, read my essay "Aloneness and Bird Wisdom" 🐦⬛
Thanks for the honesty about the pain.
I love this! All of this!
Mary, I’d so glad to hear that this moved you. Thank you so much for your kind words.🙏
I love this symbol for you and your daughter, Mary. I see 'helm' as a perfect Tattoo for you both. 'Leader, guide and legacy of words passed from mother to daughter.' There's something magical in the symbol, and I felt a tingle-thrill as I read your article. Some things fit perfectly. Shield and sword arms ready. In your case, 'the pen is mightier than the sword!' ;-) A beautiful essay, as always!
Thank you, Victoria! Much love to you always.🙏😊💕🥰🫶
Much love to you too, Mary. Gentle hugs to Mini and hellos and best wishes to your daughter. xo
Thank you, Victoria! I do feel a special connection with my daughter, and I wanted to show that. I love her so deeply. It moves me profoundly that she wanted to do this with me.❤️
I hear you, Mary - like I said, Tingly thrills of magic!
Oh, my dear. You are the most exquisite writer. I'm so happy you did this. Shared the story AND got the tattoo. I love sharing the "badass" designation with you! xoxo
Nan, isn't it great? Thank you for lighting a fire under me. Wish I'd gotten it done earlier, But it would have been a completely different essay. xoxo
So glad you got me going, Nan! Badass sisters forever.
You betcha! xoxo
Beautiful (as always) 💛. I love this story.
Thank you, Margaret! I love yours as well. That most recent poem, with the photo of your daughter, was an absolute joy.🙏❤️
I love that you were the one who suggested getting tattoos with your daughter. What a special relationship you have with her. Growing up I was very close with my mother, the original badass, but when she wasn't supportive of my marriage, a chasm opened between us. I wish she could have been less badass and more vulnerable about her fear of being replaced as my best friend. It turns out the real flex is honesty rather than bravado. I'm drawn to you and your writing Mary because you don't shy away from the hard feelings. I've learned that real strength is revealing our perceived weaknesses and deepening our relationships with those we love the most. XO 🥰❤️
Amy, so true. Relationships are complicated. It isn't our job to fix them, but to change and grow within them. Love this comment! You are so special to me. I haven't revealed my top reads for the summer, but you may be on that list. 🤗🥰💕
Thank you for this beautiful post! I’m 55 and wanted a tattoo when I was in my 20s, but it was illegal in Massachusetts at the time. As a grad student I lacked both the time and money to go travel to get it done. I’ve had the urge on and off since then but couldn’t decide what to get. Now, at 55 I am strongly considering it again.
I thought about it for a very long time. Years. But the time was never right. And then it hit me: why not get matching tattoos with my daughter? She came up with the design. It was meaningful on so many levels, and why not. So glad I did.
HTTPS://www.snowtattoo.com we tattoo all ages. Age don’t matter, your story does
I love your way with words. This one made me smile all the way through, with familiarity. My now 22-year old daughter has over the years had me accompany her to purchase Docs, has had hair dyed purple, green, and burgundy, and has recently been gently inquiring if I would EVER consider getting a tattoo with her. She has two. I love the meaning of the one you and yours chose. Thanks for this.
Wendy! The hair. How many colors are there in the rainbow? I remember bringing her to expensive salons when she wanted it bleached, and of course it turned some crazy shade of orange and fell out. I don’t remember how many pairs of Docs she had. But when she graduated from high school, her hair was long, blond and beautiful and she looked like a model. The things they put us through. This tattoo, though, is so meaningful. It makes it worth every single we went through.🫶
I felt that so intensely reading your words. I look forward to the day my daughter and I take this step together.
Mary, I loved reading your story and especially about your Viking roots. I think it's great that you have your tattoo. I'm Jewish, and we're not supposed to have tattoos, which is fine, since I'm also a chicken. However, I'm not afraid to admit that despite being a proud Jew, I happen to love, and have since childhood, the stories of Norse legends. Even though Wagner was an active and verbal anti-semite, I can't help loving the music he wrote for the Ring cycle. My wife and I just finished watching Das Rhinegold and we'll soon watch Siegfried. At the moment, we're watching "Love for Three Oranges."
If I had a tattoo, I think it would be a Moomin. I love the books by Tove Jansson and read them to my sons when they were growingup.
Thank you, Sandy! Fortunately, the Helm of Awe has been mostly left alone by the hate groups, because the meaning isn’t in your face like some of the others (many contain runes and are much more identifiably Nordic). I do have to set aside the appropriation of these great works by evil minds in order to appreciate the beauty. I haven’t listened to the complete Ring, but I want to get back to it. For me, it’s hard to give up the canceled authors.
A Moomin would make a delightful I I’m mom tattoo. I love those books and pictures.
GREAT ink story! My body's introduction to ink was 3.5 years ago, after Mark died. A line drawing of a couple kissing. Simple. Almost abstract. Since then, added another, an unalome, which my daughter had done at the same time, but with subtle variations. I love tattoos because they're often a memento, and an invitation to share our all-too- human stories.
I’ve thought about adding another one. But I’m moving cautiously. Love owls, as he did. I have them all over the house. I’m so happy to have sent this post out. Wonderful to hear from you.
This is beautiful and touching, as always. And I’m imagining my mama and me in these roles and keep dissolving into laughter.
It’s so interesting how a shared symbol can bring two people together. Or art, as in the case of my own mother! I can think of so many ways this would have horrified her. Such a joy. I’m so glad things are different with my own daughter.
I love it! And the picture your husband took is beautiful. I don’t have any tattoos…maybe I’ll get one with my daughter one day 🥰🥰
I can see you acquiring one, maybe connected to your travels or teaching. My husband did take a nice picture, didn’t he? He has a few more on his phone, which I still have access to. (That’s a story I’m working on.) But this one is the best. Thanks, Jenna, for stopping by.
My dad has a (rather ugly) butterfly on his shoulder. If I get one, it’ll probably be that. I ❤️ my Dad.
To say I relate is an understatement. But briefly-- I got my first tattoo (hummingbird on a morning-glory vine, right shoulder blade) when I turned fifty, because my daughter was turning 18 and declared she was getting one. So I said- ok, we'll get tattooed together. And we did. The, when I turned 65 (after going through much personal trauma) I got an owl on my left forearm. My recent post "Finding Feathers" speaks to this... https://kanderson.substack.com/p/finding-feathers Thanks for your wonderful and inspiring writing, Mary! p.s. Both my daughters (late 30's) have multiple tattoos. I may just get another one before my days run out...
Karen, I’m so glad this spoke to you. I’m thinking about getting another one myself. After all, I have plenty of space! And moments to hold in my memory. I will definitely check out your post. Thank you for sharing it.🙏