Colleen, I don’t know what to say. I know that the struggles you’ve endured have given you great insight and compassion. This message is a shining example of this.
I think of how shocking it was to experience the callous behavior of those who should have known how to comfort and console. It was truly one of the worst experiences of my life. I honestly would have preferred sanctimonious bullshit to casual indifference. It’s so sad to hear that others have had similar or worse experiences. That’s what motivated me to write this post.
The AI programmed response? Wow. Could I get a computer to write a more touching, heartfelt eulogy than a relative or friend? How scary is that?
So sorry you had to deal with that company! I got my husband in a black cardboard box after declining fancy urns. I knew where his ashes were going...temporary box was fine. It sat proudly between the floral arrangements at the church service. You’ve written this so beautifully... I can feel your hurting heart; trying to function while just floating along. Thank you for sharing so intimately. Hugs
Thank you, Joan, for your kind comments. I really was shocked by the lack of empathy I encountered. And when I went on Yelp months later and read about experiences worse than mine, I felt terribly sad. It made me wonder how many more people have gone through this. Good to know that you also resisted the pressure to spend money on an overpriced, showy urn. Again, my sympathy for your loss.❤️
I’m so sorry. I think it may have been the one thing she did right. A robotic speech, and I may not remember it correctly. At least I know I should check these things ahead of time. How awful that you weren’t alerted. It adds to your anguish.❤️
Thank you, Liz. It was a difficult experience at a vulnerable time. One doesn’t know what to expect, of course, but I certainly hope that others don’t have to go through anything like this.❤️
This post leaves me stricken. Regardless of the circumstances, when death ultimately arrives the world changes forever. Apple has a new feature with the latest iOS and SonomaOS that tries to guess what you're going to write next. You can either hit the space bar and agree with the prediction, or simply continue to type your own words. As I attempted to apologize for a tardy response to you in an email, the AI program suggested "sorry for your loss."
I'm only mentioning this to convey that even the damn robots have more compassion than you were shown. You have hit a raw nerve in conveying your grief experience. The twists and turns and sensory details demand a visceral response in your reader. I am so sorry for your profound loss, and heartened by your courage to bring the emotions to your craft.
How many thousands of survivors have been treated this callously? It was your loss and unique abilities to elucidate, that exposed this operation for the shysters that they are.
Colleen: Again, I don't know what to say. You are so deeply kind. It touches me profoundly, and shows me once more how deep our connection is. You always lift me up.❤️
My experience with my dad a few years ago was a little better, including the requisite empathy; it’s not that much to ask, particularly of those who have chosen to work in a profession which puts them in constant contact with those who are dying. I am truly sorry for your loss, Mary.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss, and saddened by the callousness with which you were treated at such an emotional and difficult time. People can be so thoughtless. Hoping and praying your grief is eased bit by bit every day 💔🙏🏻😢
I am so sorry for your loss ... and touched by the photo with your husband’s sweater. I kept reading, shocked, and I thought there must be some horrible misunderstanding coming. This experience is simply unfathomable. It’s beyond words - and yet you’ve shared it beautifully.
Colleen, I don’t know what to say. I know that the struggles you’ve endured have given you great insight and compassion. This message is a shining example of this.
I think of how shocking it was to experience the callous behavior of those who should have known how to comfort and console. It was truly one of the worst experiences of my life. I honestly would have preferred sanctimonious bullshit to casual indifference. It’s so sad to hear that others have had similar or worse experiences. That’s what motivated me to write this post.
The AI programmed response? Wow. Could I get a computer to write a more touching, heartfelt eulogy than a relative or friend? How scary is that?
Thank you for sharing, dear friend.❤️
What a beautifully moving piece of writing - thank you for sharing. And I am so sorry for your loss.
Thank you, Monique. I’m glad I can reach out to people and share my story.
So sorry you had to deal with that company! I got my husband in a black cardboard box after declining fancy urns. I knew where his ashes were going...temporary box was fine. It sat proudly between the floral arrangements at the church service. You’ve written this so beautifully... I can feel your hurting heart; trying to function while just floating along. Thank you for sharing so intimately. Hugs
Thank you, Joan, for your kind comments. I really was shocked by the lack of empathy I encountered. And when I went on Yelp months later and read about experiences worse than mine, I felt terribly sad. It made me wonder how many more people have gone through this. Good to know that you also resisted the pressure to spend money on an overpriced, showy urn. Again, my sympathy for your loss.❤️
Your mention of paperwork reminds me of a post I could write...we had travel and water and no papers. 😉 The things we don’t know we don’t know!!
I’m so sorry. I think it may have been the one thing she did right. A robotic speech, and I may not remember it correctly. At least I know I should check these things ahead of time. How awful that you weren’t alerted. It adds to your anguish.❤️
This wrenches my soul! Such a beautiful and tragic piece of writing. I’m so sorry for your loss, and for the callousness with which it was treated.
Thank you, Liz. It was a difficult experience at a vulnerable time. One doesn’t know what to expect, of course, but I certainly hope that others don’t have to go through anything like this.❤️
Mary,
This post leaves me stricken. Regardless of the circumstances, when death ultimately arrives the world changes forever. Apple has a new feature with the latest iOS and SonomaOS that tries to guess what you're going to write next. You can either hit the space bar and agree with the prediction, or simply continue to type your own words. As I attempted to apologize for a tardy response to you in an email, the AI program suggested "sorry for your loss."
I'm only mentioning this to convey that even the damn robots have more compassion than you were shown. You have hit a raw nerve in conveying your grief experience. The twists and turns and sensory details demand a visceral response in your reader. I am so sorry for your profound loss, and heartened by your courage to bring the emotions to your craft.
How many thousands of survivors have been treated this callously? It was your loss and unique abilities to elucidate, that exposed this operation for the shysters that they are.
This is a transcendent piece of writing.
~C
Colleen: Again, I don't know what to say. You are so deeply kind. It touches me profoundly, and shows me once more how deep our connection is. You always lift me up.❤️
My experience with my dad a few years ago was a little better, including the requisite empathy; it’s not that much to ask, particularly of those who have chosen to work in a profession which puts them in constant contact with those who are dying. I am truly sorry for your loss, Mary.
Thank you, Bill. And very sorry for your loss.❤️
Beautiful.
And I truly am sorry for your loss.
Thank you, DeeDee.❤️
I am so deeply sorry for your loss, and saddened by the callousness with which you were treated at such an emotional and difficult time. People can be so thoughtless. Hoping and praying your grief is eased bit by bit every day 💔🙏🏻😢
I am so sorry for your loss ... and touched by the photo with your husband’s sweater. I kept reading, shocked, and I thought there must be some horrible misunderstanding coming. This experience is simply unfathomable. It’s beyond words - and yet you’ve shared it beautifully.